Jeffrey R. Holland on Finding a Companion

“There are many qualities you will want to look for in a friend or a serious date – to say nothing of a spouse and eternal companion – but surely among the very first and most basic of those qualities will be those of care and sensitivity toward others, a minimum of self-centeredness that allows compassion and courtesy to be evident. ‘That best portion of a good man’s life [is] his . . . kindness,’ said Mr. William Wordsworth (‘Lines Composed a Few Miles Above Tintern Abbey’ [1798], lines 33–35). There are lots of limitations in all of us that we hope our sweethearts will overlook. I suppose no one is as handsome or as beautiful as he or she wishes, or as brilliant in school or as witty in speech or as wealthy as we would like, but in a world of varied talents and fortunes that we can’t always command, I think that makes even more attractive the qualities we can command – such qualities as thoughtfulness, patience, a kind word, and true delight in the accomplishment of another. These cost us nothing, and they can mean everything to the one who receives them.” Jeffrey R. Holland, How Do I Love Thee, BYU Devotional Address, February 2000

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